Over the last couple of years, becoming somewhat “internet-famous-ish”, has had it’s ups and downs. I love meeting people that follow us..I love it when people come up and want a picture.. because that usually means you’ve made a positive impact on them, or at least made them laugh a time or two, but I will say it’s kind of awkward when I’m in a store delivering groceries and perishable foods, and someone runs up and wants a selfie, while the customer service manager and cashiers are wondering why in the hell some lady wants a picture with a truck driver. It’s kind of like being rich with Monopoly money.. lots of people know who you are, but you still gotta work, because believe it or not 2,500 likes on a funny Facebook post, doesn’t pay you a damn thing .. so you still have to ask to use a sick day to go do fun stuff like be on a radio show for free… which makes it super awkward the next day when you go back to work, and some older guy that you’ve worked with for 16 years that doesn’t use social media, but has an FM radio, wants to know why in the hell you were on the radio yesterday.. it’s a very humbling conversation.
For the most part, everything that I post is family related. I talk and joke about my wife and kids, and try to bring positivity to all of our imperfect and chaotic lives.. so one of the oddest parts for me, is the amount of tit pics I’ve recived, and the enemies I’ve made over the last couple years.. Don’t get me wrong, my inbox isn’t full of women wanting me to ditch my wife and her PMS hormones and run away with them and start putting up with their mood swings… and it’s not always someone telling me I’m an asshole for posting pictures of my daughter crying.. Most of my messages are great and I love reading them.. but for a guy that basically just post PG-13 material to the internet, I’ve had to deal with my share of whack jobs… Like yesterday when I was solicited sex via messenger.. I don’t know the person..& maybe it was just an ISIS account, or maybe it was a fake account.. maybe it was real. Who knows? About 8 hours after I posted a screenshot of my reply to her, Facebook deleted my post, and said that I “didn’t follow Community standards”. So, I guess it’s okay to solicit sex on Facebook, as long as you don’t turn their offer down publicly??
I thought since this was taken down , I would post it in a Blog and also take a trip down memory lane and look at some of the other times I’ve had an opportunity to go on Troll Patrol, or just be involved in some funny conversations on facebook. I’ll just start with yesterday’s episode.
I’ll give Crystal (or Isis) one thing.. she’s not the kind of girl that likes to rush into things. She took it nice and slow for over 6 months, before she finally got to the point.
Why the delete? Really? I would probably feel safer if she would just go ahead and tell me this is really an Isis account.
Well.. after trying to let her down easy, it looks like I violated Facebook laws.. WHAT. IN. THE. HELL? Okay.. let’s move on..
If you guys follow me on Facebook, you know that I love Jesus, but I have an adult beverage every now & then.. I usually blame my very minimum alcoholic beverage consumption on having three girls in my house and having to deal with estrogen all the time.. but it never fails, the second I post a picture on my page of us all out to eat and there’s a beer in my hand.. I’m a hypocrite and a stumbling block, and it’s usually a comment or message from a lady who may or may not smok 2 packs of Pall Malls a day and stays zooted on kolonapin and the smell of cat urine.. but who am I to judge?
Let’s move on to, Troy. Troy kept sending me messages, but made them to where I couldn’t reply to them, so I took that as a challenge, and answered him with a rather lengthy public Facebook response.
Thank you for the message, and please excuse the late response. Since you’ve made it unable for me to reply to you via messenger, I’ll just go ahead and reply to you here.
First of all, I’m sorry if my “profanity” offends you. I have took some time to look back through my page and I assume you are talking about the words “sh#t” and “d#mn”. (I’ll block them out in this post, because they are obviously offensive to you) Yes, I have thrown those words out occasionally on here in a playful or jokingly manner. I have never felt convicted for using language like that in the context that I use it, because in all actuality, they mean the same as words like “crap” and “dang”, that your 75 year old aunt Beverly (just a guess) said that it was okay for you to use.
I have pondered on your accusation of being a hypocrite, and the more I think about it, the more hypocritical I feel for trying to think of nice ways to reply to you, when really my flesh just wants to make this much shorter and go ahead and simply call you an asshole, (which is definantly a sin. But please let me finish) You are right. We are ALL hypocrites and sinners and not one of us are worthy of His love, but by His Grace, and His work on the Cross we can be forgiven.. I think Peter is a perfect example of that.. He was a strong willed and courageous man, but at times he was quick to speak, impulsive and impetuous. Probably a lot like you and I both. To me one of the most amazing things in the Bible, is how Jesus took 12 politically incorrect men.. A dozen sinners just like me, and not only made them a mouthpiece, but gave them the platform to change the world through His gospel.
I think the point I’m trying to get to is this: My sin is not in a word alone. My conviction comes from countless other things..like Idolatry; I often put my favorite football team ahead of things that should be way more important than that.. like my family, my friends, and yes, sometimes my God.. I at times feel convicted for saying hateful things to my wife and the ones I love in a moment of anger.. and sometimes my conviction comes from ignoring my kids cartwheel to read or write something on the internet. This list could go on and on. What do you do, Troy? What is in your closet that makes you fall short of the glory of God? The book of Isaiah says “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags”. I am NOT saying that my actions are right, and I’m not saying that you or anyone else should agree with me.. but I do think that WE as Christians should examine our own sinful ways, and stop pointing fingers at each other. Every day I fall short, and everyday He lifts me back up. Countless times Jesus has saved my ass, and I’m not talking about my donkey.
I hope if you follow us on here, you’ll continue to. The last thing I want to do is come off as hypocritical or fake. My life desire is to help heal peoples pain with laughter, and show the world that people CAN indeed be real people, love God, and still have fun. Sorry for the lengthy response to your short message.
Jason A Ward.
I marked out Troy’s last name in this blog… When I posted it to Facebook , I didn’t.. and shortly after I was notified that his name had been searched over 70 thousand times. Oops! Sorry, Troy. Change your settings to where I can reply to you via messenger, and I’ll respond privately next time❤
One day I simply tried to make a post about Nirvana and Kurt Cobain..and the Millennial babies tried to eat me up.. Well, “tried”.
This is just a comment from my dad to someone who was trying to look way too far into one of Amy’s Facebook post. I love it.. So simple, yet profound.
My kids are too young to be on social media, so when they troll me, they have to do it in real life..and sometimes that forces me to have to break out a red pen. GoTigers!
For those of you that are blessed enough to know, Amy, you know that one thing is for sure… She will pray for you , she will pray for anybody. This was a message I sent her early in my Breaking Bad binge-watching obsession..
I received this message just days after our Sling Blade Starbucks drive-thru went viral. I couldn’t quit talking like Karl Childers… Or texting like him for that matter.
Remember earlier when I said that I love to meet people that follow us? I met this guy in Arizona at the Clemson vs. Alabama National Championship Game. I even gave him a souvenir I wasn’t going to use. GoTigers!
For every 10 negative messages and comments I get, there are 100 fun ones like Brad’s, and like Jamie’s below.. This one will always be my favorite, and the reason I will always do what I do..
I could literally sit here and post these all day, but I think I’ll stop now. If you’ve wasted the last 20 minutes of your life that you’ll never get back reading these I’ll go ahead and apologize, and thank you at the same time. We love you guys! ..Well.. the majority of you, anyway. 😉 Thanks for hanging with us.